My Week- The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

The Good 

Winning most entertaining blog at last weekends inaugural Irish Parenting Blog Awards. I was really surprised and delighted to win most entertaining blog. I now have a bit of the fear I will never be entertaining again. Obviously I was unable to give an entertaining acceptance speech and instead mumbled something about not being funny and a thank you. So now I am comfortable back behind a screen, thank you IPB for the award and to my family for allowing me to over share on a regular basis.


It was a brilliant night. Funny, friendly, good food, great company, goodie bags, alcohol, everything you could want. Well done to everybody involved and all the other winners. Rock star’s the lot of you.

On Wednesday I had an appointment in town. The five-year old insisted on coming with me. She passed the time by counting the Yes and No posters for the upcoming marriage referendum as we drove through town. Loudly. Even at  five she is incredulous that there needs to be a referendum to allow people to marry whom ever they want.  Says it all really. She stopped her counting to give me all her opinions, I expect to see her on Primetime in the future. The highlight of her poster counting came when we stopped in traffic outside Pantibar. She is confident of a yes result.


We stopped for a sneaky bag of chips in Beshoff’s ( best chips in Dublin)  on the way home and ate them straight from the paper on the double yellows with the hazards on, her first political analysis and her first time experiencing Beshoff chips on the one days, a good day.

The Bad

My house is a tip. Still. At no stage this wake did I wake up with  incredible housekeeping skills. I keep hoping will happen. Still dreaming big……….

Head lice has been raging through one of my children’s class for months now. I thought the Easter break had finally ended their relentless march. A note came home from school yesterday. They march on. Fuckers.

The Ugly

I have been watching, years after everyone else, The Good Wife on Netflix. Binge watching for the last month. Because I am watching it years after everyone else I was unaware of any spoilers ( of which there is one coming so if you plan on watching it don’t read on). So I innocently got into bed on Weds night, put on my headphones and lay down to enjoy the tiny bit of quiet time I get every day and Will was shot and is dead. Bereft. All the memories of Billy dying in Ally McBeal came flooding back and another fictional American lawyer bought it in a courtroom.

Goodbye Will. Ride. Just dying with no warning.

Goodbye Will. Just dying with no warning.

I cried ugly tears just as I did twenty years when Billy died. Sobbed. Like a loser. I woke up the next morning troubled which is pretty sad since again its a fictional character. I don’t see why he had to die. It was grim. It wasn’t even good crying. Good crying is Annie. When Daddy Warbucks joins in on The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow, they are good cathartic tears. Will dying, ugly tears. I am not really over it and clearly detached from reality. Speaking of Annie, have you seen the new one?  I thought I would hate it, I loved it. I am going to watch it again this weekend and cry.

So yes, the good was better than the bad this week. I have been looking for an excuse to sign off on something, anything with award-winning, I was tempted to sign one of the homework copies with it this week but restrained myself . I can’t restrain myself anymore,

Kindest Regards,

From an award-winning blogger ( who is lice free by the way to any of the other bloggers who are now worried that may have hugged me or where sitting near me last week, lice free but obnoxious and award winning)

How was your week?

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8 Ways To Stop Snacking At Night Time


I eat at night-time. I wait till the kids go to bed then I eat the chocolate I won’t share with them during the day. It’s out of concern for their teeth. I do it only for love. Then they go to bed and it seems my only hobby now is eating crap when my children slumber. This needs to stop. I realise I could stop buying the crap but that doesn’t work.  So I have come up with this handy list for anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation.



1. Apply masking tape over your mouth, making it difficult to eat.

2. Tie your hands behind your back. You need your hands to eat. You don’t want to be that person that eats directly from the plate like an animal. Your munchies are not that strong.

3. Tie your feet together, making it harder to get to the shop, kitchen, cookie jar.

* You are also set up now for introduction to S&M if you wanted to try that instead of eating*

4. Drink all the water instead. Use a straw if your hands are still tied from #2 above . This is a risky one because you then have to move off the couch to pee every twenty minutes and once your off the couch you are moving closer to the food. Pee and resume drinking the water.

5. Take up a hobby. Knit or something. Or start a blog and write lists about how not to eat all the food at night-time.

6. Get nuts and grains, the stuff skinny people snack on of an evening and make art from them.


7. If your significant other is the type who likes to snack at nighttime but also has some sort of weird speedy metabolism which ensures they don’t gain weight, shout at them. Call them a feeder, tell them this night-time snacking is all their fault. Bonus no eating points, if the fight gets so bad you have to storm off to bed to sulk. Most bedrooms are a decent distance from the kitchen where the food lives.

8. Go online and look at all the things you will buy with the money you have saved from not buying crap and think about how happy you will be with your wealth and skinniness. Envisage your wealthy slimmer self instead of eating a full packet of Haribo. Haribo. I love jellies.


That’s all I have. Am starved. Starved.

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On Guilt

I am not at my finest at the minute. I feel like I doing everything at best, averagely. It is probably just because of the cumulative effect of a year of broken sleep.

This morning was a spectacular fail,an exercise in bad parenting. It was just one of those one bad ones. Toothpaste smeared all over clean uniforms, shoes lost again, complaints about breakfasts, hair with tangles, one child crying over the lost shoes and a refusal to wear the alternative shoes. Another child accessorizing like she was going to Glastonbury instead of school and then another one seeing her opportunity because she hadn’t lost her shoes and was ready on time,repeating constantly “I am your best child, right?”  over and over and over.

I snapped. I was harsher than was called for. Much harsher if I am completely honest. I tried to apologise in the car. We made up but it was still there. The atmosphere. Nobody was happy and that was all my fault. I hate that.

Realistically they are in school now not giving me a second thought, the practical part of my brain knows that. Another part of me wants to drive up to school and take them out for the day but they would be horrified. They love school,in fact, if I tried to that, they would probably refuse. That would be awkward. So I will sit here instead avoiding doing things I am meant to be doing.

I am writing this down in the hope that next time toothpaste is smeared all over a uniform or another shoe or bag goes missing at 8.15am that I realise it is not the end of the world and giving out about it isn’t going to help.  First thing in the morning when we are running late is never going to be a good time to listen to random facts about sharks but there are better ways to explain that than how I did this morning.

I am not trying to be a perfect mother,I just don’t want to be a shit one. I celebrate averageness.  My current life goal is being able to open the hotpress without all the towels falling out, I am not looking for greatness or reaching for the stars here. I will mark it down as a bad day. They happen. Be grand.



* I just looked down to see what was keeping the baby so quiet while I wrote this and she was chewing on a used coffee capsule. Winning at all levels of parenting today.*

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It’s Tricky


Dance like nobody is watching. Isn’t that the saying? Of a morning sometimes, I dance with the baby or to the baby. She sits in her highchair and I dance. I do this secure in the knowledge she hasn’t got the vocabulary to repeat what she has seen.

She enjoys some classic hip hop in the morning time. We listen to Spotify playlists. She is partial to some Dr Dre, Jayz,  etc…. I feel like I have done my time with nursery rhymes which is possibly a bit harsh on fourth child but you know I feel Spotify is helping her establish some good dance moves a lot more successfully than Cbeebies ever did for my older children.

Anyway last week, I was making my usual half-hearted attempt at cleaning up, she was throwing blueberries on the floor, the music was on. Run D.M.C. –Its Tricky was playing. She started dancing. So did I, I was rapping too obviously because it’s pretty hard to listen to Run D.M.C without joining in. I was using the brush as a mic. All was good. To paint the full picture – my hair was unbrushed, I was swinging a sweeping brush, I was wearing a dressing gown over a rather fetching was once black vest and large knickers and yes rapping

It’s Tricky to rock a rhyme, to rock a rhyme that’s right on time
It’s Tricky…(How is it D?) It’s Tricky (Tricky) Tricky (Trrrrrricky)

I was  singing and rapping the two parts showing remarkable skill. The baby was enjoying it and then I noticed her looking past me. There was a courier just standing, in horror, at the window holding a box. We have no doorbell. The music or possibly my eh rapping was too loud to hear his knocks. HORROR. He was about three feet from me. There was no way he had missed my performance.

run dmc

I considered dropping to the floor and pretending to be dead but the baby had starting waving to him at this stage. I went out. The music changed to Get Your Freak On. Of course it did. There is no way back from such a situation. I opened the door. He asked me my name. Because he was a courier and needed to record the name of whoever took delivery of the parcel. In my flustered state I didn’t immediately realise this and just stood opening and closing my mouth. I considered saying Missy Elliot then remembered not everyone enjoys my sense of humour and really there was no recovery options here. I remembered my name, told him it, took the box. It was heavier than I anticipated. I went to put it down, felt a gush of air where I shouldn’t, looked down and realised my vigorous dancing had clearly dislodged my ginormous left boob from my horrible old vest and it was precariously just staying within its confines. I was screaming in my head at this stage “just fucking go“. I possibly said it out loud. He left. I looked up. He practically ran down the driveway,he leapt into his van and sped away.

If you are going to dance like nobody is watching make sure nobody is in fact watching. Close the curtains. Word from the wise. ( I rapped that last bit.)

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SEAT Alhambra- The Kids Review and Vlog

A couple of weeks ago I was given the opportunity to review the SEAT Alhambra. You can read my initial thoughts on the car here. A couple of weeks in and my love affair with the car continues not just for me but for the kids too. So I give you their review, if nothing else, kids are always honest. These are their favourite things about the SEAT Alhambra.

Jack our Giraffe fits comfortably, this is always important when choosing a car. The toys need to fit.

Jack seatbelted and secure in the passenger seat. Turned away from the window so as not to cause road traffic accidents from nosey other road users.

Jack seatbelted and secure in the passenger seat. Turned away from the window so as not to cause road traffic accidents from nosey other road users.

In his full glory taken advantage of the sunroof. He can stand comfortably behind the front seats and not distract the driver. Always important when driving with a life size baby giraffe in the car.

In his full glory taking advantage of the sunroof. He can stand comfortably behind the front seats and not distract the driver. Always important when driving with a life-size baby giraffe in the car.

All three actually mentioned their love of the panoramic sunroof.


Look at that blue sky.  Its like driving a convertible without the damage to your hair.

Look at that blue sky.
It’s like driving a convertible without the damage to your hair.

The Sliding Doors


The integrated booster seats.

No car seats taking up space and the joy of the integrated booster is that its always fitted correctly.

No car seats taking up space and the joy of the integrated booster is that its always fitted correctly.

The tables are also a huge hit.

The seat table has brought a ridiculous amount of joy. It is indeed "just like a table on a plane" a much used statement this month.

The seat table has brought a ridiculous amount of joy. It is indeed “just like a table on a plane” a much used statement this month.


They enjoy my “magic trick” of being able to tell who has their seat belt fastened first. This image comes up on the dashboard showing which seats are bucked. They hurry to be the first one buckled in and this also has the added advantage of alerting me if someone opens a seat belt which one of my children is prone to doing.


See the seat map under the temperature. This shows which seat belts are engaged.



For more detail I will hand you over to the one take five-year old for her full review. Watch out Jeremy Clarkson, there’s a new car reviewer waiting in the wings:




For more information on the SEAT Alhambra check out  for prices and performance information and where you can organise a test drive in Ireland.




Disclaimer : SEAT Ireland offered me the use of a SEAT Alhambra for one month for review purposes. All opinions, as always, are my own and the five-year old’s opinions are her own! 

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Baby Talk

So the new one is almost 11 months old. She has some words. The first one was a sound that sounded somewhat like Hello, so we went with that and screamed hello manically back at her and waved every time she made the sound. She kind of stopped saying it then.


Then there was the very cute Mama and Dada ( Mama first, for record purposes) Then she really got the hang of MAMA. She can say it with force and meaning and now there are four who scream this name at me.

Then she added DAT to her vocabulary. Dat is that I think and she has started to say it when she wants something, again useful and the dat was welcomed. The dat has become kind of scary though. She now wakes up muttering dat dat dat dat dat. At 6am the dat could be a soother or a boob or a request for me to stop putting my back to her. I try to work it out quickly before her eyes open fully and she wakes up.  The dat has served as a reminder that she will be a toddler soon.


Just recently she has mastered the dog’s name, Ted. It has become her favourite word. Every time she shouts Ted, the dog comes running. The dog is used to being called. Up to this point when he was called it meant time to be fed or time to be walked and he ran merrily towards his name being shouted.

Ted come watch me eat.

Come, watch me eat.

She has killed that in the last week or two.  Crushed his spirit. He kind of  shudders  when he hears his name now. The gobshite still comes when she calls his name despite knowing its only to watch her eat, or have his eyeball poked. He is loyal though and is literally at her beck and call and she calls, over and over and over and over.

Ted, look at you outside. I am inside and warm. I will call you repeatedly to remind you of this fact.

Ted, look at you outside. I am inside and warm. I will call you repeatedly to remind you of this fact.

All these words finally led up to the big moment this week of her very first sentence. Being a fourth child, she is adored and her every  move applauded by five other people and tolerated by the dog.  She doesn’t make strange with people, I believe she thinks everyone in the world is there to idolize her. When we are out she makes eye contact and beams at anyone who gives her a second glance. A couple of months ago she had two gardai singing to her at the table behind us while I eat my lunch in peace and they entertained her. So the first sentence kind of confirmed my belief that she believes the whole world is waiting to love her. She was sitting on my lap and her brother and sisters came into the room and sat beside her, she raised one hand and said “Hey Fans” and waved. HEY. FANS. Jay-sus.


Hey Fans

Hey Fans

Now of course, being 11 months old, she might not have actually meant to call us fans. That’s what we are though. The force is strong in this one.

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Celebrating The Mom Blogger



Do you need something new to read? Well I have a lengthy list for you. The very first Irish Parenting Blog Awards take place next month to celebrate the best in parenting blogging in Ireland.

There are over 80 parenting bloggers on the lists, predominantly mothers, who blog about all aspects of parenting and beyond. Sometimes the mom blogger gets a negative reaction. I have read many dismissive comments online over the years about mom bloggers. I reckon people who hold this opinion either don’t read parenting blogs, aren’t parents or just haven’t had the fortune to stumble upon some of the talented parenting bloggers that are out there.

The list of Irish Parenting Bloggers is here. If you have some spare time have a read. I am not going to list my favourites as I know I will omit some but will I tell you why I follow so many of them? I do because I like reading about other peoples experiences. I am nosy. I like knowing other parents sometimes have the same highs and lows that I do. I read them for inspiration. Some of these bloggers make me laugh, some make me think, some teach me things and most of them entertain me. They are my go to if I need dinner inspiration or if I need a new face cream, I will find a recommendation. There is a lot that I can identify with in some of these blogs and then there are blogs that give a snapshot of a life so different to mine.

I like reading about things that are familiar and things that aren’t. Life in Wexford, Washington DC and on farms and on housing estates, commuting,  cooking, home schooling,celebrating bread sticks and first steps, eyebrow envy, pregnancy, birth, school days, tantrums, children cursing, babies not sleeping, boobs, making doll houses from bookcases and dinners from ingredients some of which I can’t pronounce. Illness, holidays, Tuesdays, rants, tips, book recommendations, things to avoid, things that make you nod your head in recognition. There is a wealth of talented writers, funny people and entertaining blogs on this list do have a look and add a few to your reading list.

I’m looking forward to a night out next month anyway. Might even get big hair for the occasion……



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